Just a refresher! Sometimes we think we’re saying “I love you,” but it’s not being heard as such. We’re taking an informal survey of our members’ love language so mark which one describes you best on our love language list. Please read below: by Athena Chris
Encouraging words (Words of Affirmation)
High on the list are words of encouragement, praise, or appreciation of a job well done. None of these languages are gender specific, but most males seem to really dig being told you are proud of their work and efforts. If praise does not come easily to you start a list of aspects you appreciate. Be specific. Then make sure to give them at least one verbal compliment a day…IF that is their love language.
Time Together (Quality Time)
Complaints that “we don’t spend time with each other,” or “you’re never around” shout out “quality time” as the love language. Sitting in the same room passively watching a movie or sitting in silence at a restaurant may or may not win any brownie points. Soo...make a list of mentioned events, places to go, and things to do...on Udorami.
Shower of Gifts (Recieving GIfts)
Gifting can be highly cultural, and personal, so do your research. Gifting for special occasions is expected, but someone whose love language involves showers of presents loves surprise gifts, big and small. If you love someone who gushes at even the tiniest trinket have them make a Udorami wish list. so you can bring them the perfect gift EVERY time. If you are that person, don't be afraid to keep a list and make it available to friends and family. They will want to speak of their love to you. It may be the thought that counts, but you will think better of them and yourself if those gifts are what you like.
Those Little Things You Do (Acts of Service)
That honey-do list may be more than a list of chores. It may well be a way of asking for or giving love. Okay, sure... there are some chores that have to be done, or else the place will resemble a post-Apocalyptic chaos, but how it is done, and the attitude determines whether you are speaking Love. When you perform a service out of fear it is because you are a slave. If it is done for a reward, then you are an employee. If it is done, however, with no thought for yourself, but purely for another, then it is Love.
Affectionate touches (Physical Touch)
Again there are some cultural and familial attitudes, but it is a scientific fact that loving touch is an emotional need. A thirty second, full-frontal hug from your spouse is AMAZINGLY connective. Ask any parents of a teenager what they miss most, and they’ll probably tell you it’s those little unexpected hugs they used to get. Scientifically, hugging induces oxytocin, the “bonding hormone,” that’s renowned for reducing stress, lowering cortisol levels and increasing a sense of trust and security.